Shutup and read

RIghteous Predicament Fortunate conflict

2007-12-11T05:46:08Z

Here it is, complete with subtitles, and magic. God bless chinese 201

Hi

2007-10-06T05:34:15Z

Words that are Metal:
Metal
Iron
Steel
Rock
Hard
Core
Hardcore
Grip
Hook
Rip
Torn
Sheared
slashed
goughed
Charred
Flames
Fire
Burn
ash
coal
Melt
inferno
Hell
Hellfire
Devil
Demon
Daemon et al
spear
axe
shield
Mail
Armor
Sword
chain
Spike
Dead
Murder
Kill
Death
Summon
Banish
Resurrect
Awaken
Slumber
Flee
Run
Charge
fly
Fight
Battle
Combat
Victory
Warrior
War
Fallen
Horn
Tusk
Boar
Stag
Dragon
phoenix-the bird burns itself to death, fucking metal
Horse
Steed
Knight
Samurai
Ninja
Viking-Regular pirates are not metal
cyborg
Vampire-sometimes metal, sometimes emo. For this list, the metal kind

To be continued

Long overdue

2007-07-27T05:32:23Z

hello.
Ok, word soup time. I'm long overdue for one of these long cathartic rants. I've been putting it off, checking everyone else's posts and I think its time to throw my paint on the canvas.

I don't know what I'm doing.

I'm just wingin' it. Life, right now, I'm flyin' by the seat of my pants. I've jumped on the wheelchair and now we're flying down the stairs shooting my uzis at all the Nazis I can see, but I'm just barely hangin' on. Oh and the wheelchair has a busted wheel and is only held together because in between spraying bullets, I'm screwing the damn thing together.

Eugene Oregon is ridiculous. If we streamlined the process of opening a business, got everything you needed under one roof, or at least a route, like "Oh you're opening a restaurant? ok here's what we're gonna hassle you with, but no. I'm scared to death that a health inspector is gonna roll up and shut us down, that the bastard carter talked to is gonna complain about my illegal sign, that the cart is gonna give someone fucking lockjaw or herpes because its a fucking piece of shit. I sterilize it the best i can, and the only thing the dogs, condiments, and buns touch are plastic tupperware, tongs, a clean steam tray, and boiling water, that shouldn't be too big of a problem, but the thing is we're not making enough money to get a new one, and fucking pay pall is gonna take three years to tell us to spend 400 more bucks to ship the damn cart back, and my dad keeps asking for 600, when we should tell him we want 800 dollars and to keep the cart. the shit isn't worth the 400 it would take to ship it back. Nobody has any kind of fucking replacement burners, I'm going to fire for life tomorrow to see if there's anything else that bastard can do.

Today I was trying to back the cart up and this fucker pulls in 3 inches away from my ruck and then tries to direct my backing up. The fucking hult center lady was very nice, and she'll probably be very nice when I call her tomorrow and am told not to go anywhere near their fucking outdoor performances. OR, i could become the official hot dog of the hult center. BUT were I to even get any kind of big business, I'm scared that the fucking poopcart won't be able to hold up and provide. as long as I'm small time the fucking cart can function but as soon as we go big, we're gonna get sued, i'm fucking sure of it. For everyone who wants a dog, don't worry, its clean, its safe, I wouldn't make the dogs if they weren't something I'd eat myself. Its all legit, but it barely works. I had to rig up a way to make the fucking steamer work, and its better than the fucking microwave. But GODDAMN this fucking cart is a huge thorn in my side. The fucking cooler doesn't drain, the fucking wheel doesn't stay on FUCK FUCK FUCK. But again, I'm wingin' it. Servin' hot dogs with a smile. I need a haircut, and I got the card of a hairdresser who bought a dog.

tangent time
I've been going to tran at che li over by churchill for a couple years now, even though she gives me a shitty haircut and overcharges me. I think its time for a change. Goddamn, this year old prescription for fucking physical therapy has reminded me that I need to call the dr back about my back. ok i'm doing that tomorrow too. because once i'm healed, I can exercise, and once i can exercise i can be happy. because right now, when I'm not exercising i'm angry and irritable and frustrated all the time. I remind myself of my mother which scares me. I hate that woman. If I've inherited her bipolar disorder I'm getting help. I think i might need to go in and get psychologically evaluated because right now, things are just crazy.

My mom plays this game called "pretend to be reasonable" and she's really good at it, see, you win if you can trick your son into thinking he wants to be around you more. I started beating her at it a while back, and I'm planning on a big win pretty soon. I joke with nick about getting her absolutely to trust me and then betraying her when it will hurt her the most, you know, give her a taste of her own medicine, But then I think, thats stupid. I'm just going to feel bad inside for hurting my mother. So I'm stuck, chained by my own moral imperative to allow myself to sleep at night.

passive aggression can't put you in jail.

the best thing would be for me to move on, unfortunately she's living in my house, with my stuff...actually she's not right now, strangers are living in my house with my stuff, while she's taking my siblings to Hawaii.

Nick laughs at all my jokes, I'm beginning to think that I'm not really as funny as I thought I was. Then again, I could do stand up. get this

fuck you i'm not telling my good jokes in text, they're awful that way, though I consider myself and apprentice jokesmith...I just need to find a master.

back to that old at hand topic, Life right now is flying forward out of control.

I own a fucking Hot dog cart! The house that my father and I live in is sinking into the mud!
I have a broken back! I'm in a Jewish Fraternity. My Parents are Divorcing!

What the fuck happened!!??

Not what I expected, thats what.

Zombies creep me the fuck out II

2007-06-21T16:58:12Z

So I'm all alone, Zombies everywhere, the sky is a dark grey blue with the rest of the world in dark greens, greys, grey blues, blacks and the occaisional red for lights like brakelights and firetrucks. I'm wandering alone for about half a second before i'm surrounded, I'm going to die but before I'm even bit they are all halved and decapitated by this guy in black. He takes me to a converted building, very defensible, where he's been holing up and training. Now that I think about it, there were probably more people like him there and he might have been the last because the compound was huge, had all kinds of alarms, traps, weapons, vehicles, and stuff for training. He started training me to fight the zombies, beginning with removing my fear of them. He had one chained up and he put chained up just out of its reach. If I moved I'd be bitten so I had to stay there, look the zombie in the eye until I didn't freak out anymore. There was a lot more training but it sort-of montaged in my memory, but I distinctly remember a bunch of zombies, somehow incapacitated to be unable to stand, lying on the floor biting at my feet as I had to run across. At first I was freaked out, but eventually I could do it no problem. i became a zombie fighting machine, fearless and effective. by this point special attention was given to the vehicles and weaponry in the compound, really cool truck type things, lots of weapons, but we went out with katanas and pistols. We would go out of the compound for whatever reason, food, supplies, whatever. we go out for supplies or somethin', a couple times and at one point, he gets bitten, helps me finish off the surrounding zombies and kills himself.

to be continued

Zombies creep me the fuck out

2007-06-14T23:55:33Z

I dunno, I've kinda gotten into a zombie phase lately. Readin the zombie survival guide, watchin' all kinds of movies with zombies in em. It's weird, because I've never been much of a zombie fan, much less a horror fan. Something about it though, its so enjoyable. anyone who wants to watch zombie movies give me a GHRNAAARR

woohoo

2007-05-14T01:31:48Z

Jewfrat For The Win

Looks like I've got approximately 32.33, repeating of course percentage of survival

I will use intimidating shout...

How's shit for all y'all's, doin well?

hey

2007-05-08T19:57:17Z

About time for another rant? yeah, could be.

We're stuck right? If the U.S. Government decreed that everyone had to chop of their dicks, to fight terrorism, we'd do it. And the rest of the world would probably have to chop their dicks off too, and then they'd hate americans for making them chop their dicks off, even though we're standing there, dickless, right next to them. Only difference is we'd probably be so fucked up in the head that we're trying to convice them that they are better off without their dicks.

Anyways, the point is, how long before enough people stand up for their dicks? And even when that happens, when it really comes down to it, could we fight the government to keep our dicks? Could anyone in the world organize a military that can defend the dicks?

The ultimate problem is that there is too much power in the world. Every country has to have this big fucking army, so that some other big fucking army doesn't come over and chop off their dicks. When enough entities get the big fuckin army, (by the way manpower isn't really the issue, its really just the omnipotent idea of "this fucking army could fuck you up and make it so you never existed" that is necessary), they all just keep getting bigger fucking armies, to keep up. Eventually the only way to defend yourself from these big fucking armies is to have your own. Nobody has a big enough army to stop the U.S. dick chopping machine.

The revolutionary war was fought because of "taxation without representation" Brits were chopping American dicks and the Americans had no say in the matter.
Well when there's no discourse in congress, the president can do whateverthefuck, and shit like the PATRIOT act slips by without so much as a "hold on you guys"
Theres a tsunami on the way, 1984 was about 24-25 years early,

The mayans were right, you don't need a calendar that goes past 2012.

Stay classy Sand Iago.

why

2007-04-17T05:02:03Z

Why are our soldiers in Iraq driving down streets in a line waiting to be blown away by IEDs? We have the greatest military in the world run by the greatest military minds in human history, yet our strategy is to roll slowly down open roads in a line waiting to be shot at and blown away. I'm not sun tsu, but honestly, is this the best we can do?

Thinking out loud

2007-04-14T20:06:43Z

Purpose. Is it possible to waste one's life? The answer is simple from an outsider's perspective. The outsider's perspective in an inherrently self-oriented one. Perhaps the outsider fears the waste of his/her own life and so wishes to vicariously extend/enhance the life of the other(cynical side note: guilt is the best motivation, causing one to fear that they themself are wasting their life and so continuing this cycle of distress.)

One does what one does.

The insecurites of others are to illicit pity. Allowing the insecurites of others to affect oneself negatively is a detriment to self actualization (Cynical side note: which is what those telling you you are wasting your life are trying to help you avoid, go figure)

One's potential can be decided only by that individual. Anyone who says otherwise is running from something or selling something, in my case, both.

Be healthy.
-The One

benevolentdkt8r @ 2007-03-19T07:49:00

2007-03-19T14:51:14Z

My ps2 is fucked
I was cleaning the lense last night and the ribbon cable connecting the on off swtich to the system came unplugged, while my dad was helping me plug it back in the connector snapped off, so now its really done. I'm gonna have to head over to cdgameexchange so i can get a new-ish one. fuck.

Ummm...hi God, how's it goin?

2007-03-05T16:47:25Z

hey, whats up big man, first off, wanna say thanks for existence, ya know, life is a pretty badass thing, I'm way stoked on physics too, not the class, just the fact that we have em, all the stuff that hard science studies is great. So yeah, no complaints there man, stellar work, I enjoy every minute of my circulatory system, not to mention the reproductive system, props for that man, for real.

Anyways, I was just wondering what the deal is now? Like, for some reason if I go home, i'm gonna get the cops called on me, which is fine by me cause we both know how messed up things are between myself and my mom. Things have been said/done on both sides that aren't ok, but seriously man, what's up wih her brain chemistry? man, why is she so irrational? Family is sometimes all you have...well, actually, I guess I can't complain. I'm healthy, my dad and I are livin the good life , I have enough food and hey, i'm even goin' to college. but damn man, the "I'm your mother, I've got your best interest at heart" is really easy to believe over and over again, every time she fucks you, after a month or so you go "it couldn't have been that bad" but its bullshit, it is that bad and she's still nutso. She had a pretty rough childhood, I understand, but wouldn't she want something better for her kids? The fucking blow movie, that was soooo accurate, I mean, damn. It was scary how close that came to reality.

I had gotten to the point where I thought the insanity would subside. Unfortunately I was incorrect. I had forgotten that she feeds on conflict. Zac and Marissa need to get out.

So, what am I gonna do? I guess I just cut my losses, get my stuff out asap, and write her off as a bad investment. This is leavin me with a different picture of the world. Family isn't worth the cum and eggs it took to make one. Fuck family, take what you can get and get while the gettin's good.

ok, I'm glad we had this talk, I'll seeya later.

Wo Mei you yisi

2007-02-23T06:24:38Z

Who are my friends?

Oscars

2007-02-15T20:43:53Z

I'm going to be renting/watching all of the movies nomitated for oscars in a multi-weekend marathon event. Whomever wishes to join me in a critical deconstruction of the academy's choices, feel free to message me.

I've only got a little time

2007-02-08T05:26:24Z

If it hadn't been for cotton mouth joe, I'dve been married a long time ago, where didja come from where didja go, where didja come from cotton mouth joe?

I wish I was in the land of cotton, I'd kill a man for potatoes au gratin, look away, look away, look away, peter pan.

What do you want? a riddle? I'll give you a riddle? What is the difference between you? Where is the space inside the light? how dense is God?

Go to hell, thats where all the interesting shit happens anyway.

do you want eternal salvation? survey says, not at the current price.

Who do you think I am?

Go and hide, death is all that awaits you here.

Cast your net and never catch a dime. Cast your line and never hook a heart. Spin your wheel and never move an inch. Write your book, and empty your soul 50% off.

Envision a world without fear, hatred, or struggle.

boring isn't it?

what are you? oh, look at that you got some yin in your yang, lemme just clean that up for ya.

Be the monkey who defeats death and demands clothing from the dragon. Born of heaven, take what you will from those who have what you want.

they'd do the same to you if given the chance.

Is there something to be done? Thoughts? suggestions? Nobody would Love to hear them, and get back to you as soon as they've got time.

Don't leave a message after the beep. I've got you on caller ID.

Peace
-Aaron

you won't do well

2007-02-01T00:35:56Z

its a hard quiz

you have to know me pretty well, like nick...or audrey...whoever she is.

Take My Quiz on
QuizYourFriends.com

I'll make this quick

2007-01-31T22:53:15Z

As people don't like to comment on my big ramblings.

Invevitability. We're born, we grow, we change, we fuck, we reproduce, we die, repeat. Its like a rollercoaster. You hang on screaming, but nothing is going to stop it. There is no free choice. Everything is predetermined. If not directly by God, indirectly through these fragile forms we carry and if we're lucky, wish to keep. I'm lucky. But we're all still Clockwork Oranges. Tick Tock. Think about it? no matter how hard you fight, when you're bleeding to death, you're bleeding to death. No matter how hard you try not to be born, it happens anyways. A roller coaster. I want off. Gotta get out, and I don't mean death. You'll never controll your life, you don't even controll your heart beating.

psh

2007-01-29T20:27:14Z

Am I a person? I think not. So often I feel like a shell of animal motives and defense mechanism personality traits. Is there a me? I feel like so many programs running, so many conditions to be met, with no substance underneath. I will not look deeper for fear that I may find that in all my efforts to cope, I have rid myself of my humanity.

which could be good or bad..

later.

I promised

2007-01-25T19:33:53Z

Last night I wanted to write on here, and I promised myself I would as soon as I finished my homework. Unfortunately I got distracted, ended up mostly finishing my math, not studying chinese and crashing before i could. Now I'm sitting in the night library about to study chinese, and I just reminded myself that I have chinese homework due tomorrow, which licks zhonguo balls. I see Jeff Chandler pushing his recycling can in the library, now he's gone. If I were a fully armed and operational battle station I'd probably work for them too. Campus recycling seems like a pretty chill job, just movin trash with cool people...I dunno, maybe not. I need to get one of those Just over brokes pretty soon, but I have that stupid dillema of only being able to work part time during school, and most jobs want me to make a career out of their training schedule, and I don't want to work an entry level job for the rest of my life. I am going to own my own international business, dealing with Chinese and American companies. My company will be the middle man, the one who goes to one company and says, Hey, I can make this this and this happen for you, and then go to the other companies and say, I need for you to do this this and this for me. Or something. I don't know if thats a job, but it would be cool. There's that, or I want to buy low in china and sell for high here in america. My own import export business would be great, or even being a buyer or seller for some company. Thats what I want to do when I get out of school. Go to some company and say, "Train me to sell your product" Then, once I'm in the business, I'll go Ok, now I want to buy for your business, then I want to start my own business that buys and sells things, hiring people to do that for me. Maybe I could buy for Lanz cabinets, or maybe there's some chinese company that needs someone who can deal with Americans. Either way, I think i have options...I hope i have options. I WILL own my own business and become crazy wealthy so that I can finance, in the long run, my world domination bid, and in the short run, make a difference in this damn world. I want enough power to actually enact change. Donating to charities is not enough. I want to have the resources to go "ok, scientists? you listening? I need a safe hydrogen fuel cell by next January, what is needed for that to happen? 30 billion dollars? Ok, you get me a fuel cell, I get you your money, done deal. Hey drug company, I just bought 51% of the stock and I vote that we make an affordable cure for cancer. That will eat into our profits? oh damn, well thats too fucking bad. WE LIVE IN THE YEAR 2007!!! where the fuck is my ROCKET-FUCKING-POWERED-HOVER-FUCKING-CAR! Computers have gotten smaller, suvs have gotten bigger but really, Humankind really hasn't advanced that far past the late 90s. We have amazing graphics in our video games, why don't our troops have Mjolnir mark 6 armor yet? That FUCKING CANADIAN Troy Hurtubese is the only one working on future(present)istic body armor for troops. The guy is a crackpot, his design doesn't look like it works, but at least he's doing something! What the fuck is nasa doing right now? we've got billions of dollars going to scientists to do shit we've already done? why not take a break from launching sattelites, and freaking out about china's blowing their OWN GODDAMN SATTELITE UP, OMG RUN FOR COVER, THE CHINEE IS A COMIN< THE CHINEE IS A COMIN! WE GOTS TA GET TO THE BUNKER!
I mean holy shit, anyways, what if nasa took a break from their coffe break and started engineering wearable, effective, light, full-body armor that can be used in harsh climates like space, so the desert where we're fighting right now isn't even a problem. The fucking bear suit guy is the only one on the job! what the FUCK!?

Anyways, thats the plan, Save the world one hemisphere at a time and all that.

I should be studying chinese, but i'm done for the day and i have some time while my cell phone charges. I think my dad needs me to take lucy to the vet, but I'm not sure. Ok, mental list check time. Chinese: Study for test mingtian, homework due mingtian. Math, gotta get to the guy's office hours before next week, probably tomorrow, cause yesterday's lesson made 0 sense. I was all "waaa?" afterwards. Chinese cultural odyssey, gotta read the stuff due yesterday before the discussion class. Econ, shit, gotta read and take notes, I'm gonna check for when my test is scheduled for, i think its int he 2nd week of February, not sure. Have I mentioned I write these things for me, not for you. You just get the privelage of peeking into my brain for a bit. okokok

Someone called me that I thought it was over with, she's been in hawaii for the past week or three, so I was like, shit, we're done, whatever, but she called day before yesterday, and I'm gonna call her as soon as my cell charges. i got the message too late last night, and my phone died this morning, so i'm all like, fuck dude, cause I'm kinda still into this person, like a lot, hope another certain person isn't reading this cause she's still bitter and stuff...anyways, this has been a great week, I watched heroes/hung out with a ton of people that I haven't really been in real contact with for a while. It was badass, and whats more badass? A TON of people and I are going to see the prestige this saturday. Its an amazing movie, I think i'm gonna ask the certain person who was in hawaii if she wants to come down for the weekend, in which case i gotta clean up the house, make it presentable. I think i'll do that, oh shit, that reminds me, for some reason, that I gotta call that damn massage therapist guy about the physical therapist guy, but first i gotta call dad and ask what doctor bob's last name is. Ok so the plan is, After I finsh writing this thing, I'm gonna go pee, then I'm gonna come back and study chinese till my cell phone charges, then I'm gonna call dad, then massage guy, then hawaii person. Coffee is awesome, I had some today, and I'm not the least bit tired right now.

anyways, fuck confucious, fuck chuang tzu and lao tzu. They're the yin and yang, two complimentary sides of shit! yeah, i said it. I'm recalling that buddhism is the most badass. I'm real big on balance, the middle way, nothing in excess etc, so thats pretty badass. Why is niche so angry? I bet christians picked on him in grade school, fucker. I really really REALLY don't like Allison's Fem-Philosophy teacher. Making fun of one of my guys!? who the fuck does she think she is, Kant is amazing. His thing about choosing to follow being the only way to be truly free, because otherwise, you're enslaved by other things. You're going to follow something, freedom is the ability to choose whom to serve, which I think is the absolute truth, bleak, but true. Basically he's saying "You're gonna get fucked, thats how it goes. The world will fuck you, People will fuck you, your self will fuck you, masturbatory rape, how's that for a north north west-south south east paradigm shift when you're used to a west west south-east east north shift. ok, explanation. In my reality, my reality is a big fucking sphere right? and on top of the sphere is a city of lincoln logs called paradigm. Inside pardigm live the people that make up my thoughts, ideas and beliefs. Sometimes the big fucking globe spins in a certain direction, moving paradigm city and collapsing the buildings on my poor miserable thought-people. Many are crushed when paradigm shifts, but I don't feel sad for long because the inhabitants of paradigm are cannibals...starving cannibals. So I like when my paradigm gets shifted, it gives me food for thought. :)

anyways, what am I talking about...oh yea, fucking Kant.(whoa looks like I got sidetracked, basically to recap, you're gonna get fucked, so the only way to be free is to choose who is fucking you.Amazing. He was the one Christian philosopher in sophies world who's opinion I gave a flying "think therefore I am" about. Fuck Nitzche, "God is DEAD wahha, i'm such a sad little emo angry at the world, I'm gonna go slit my wrists" His music and poetry were so bad he decided to get into professional bullshitting. Goddamn mel brooks is amazing. History of the world part I "what do you do?" "I'm a stand up phillosopher" 'Oh a bullshit artists...did you bullshit yesterday" "no" "did you try to bullshit yesterday" "yes"

so good yis!

so, I met this asian girl in math class day before yesterday, she told me her name was sunny, spelled synny, but that wasn't her real name. I think her real name is sun yoo, she's korean. We studied with her friend Wen for about 5 hours, didn't finish our math, well she did, I didn't. I feel kinda bad cause she thought I was a hard worker...pshh, how wrong was she? but it was cool. She's really funny, Wen, who is chinese, is realy quiet. Then we had dinner with her japanese roommate, whos name I forget but she called herself grandma because she was "gasp" not good with electronics, and another korean friend who calls me Aaron cool because sunny told her my last name was cool, crazy asians. They're all "Oh, you like asia? you are a geek! Americans who like asians are geeks, my friends told me that" Priceless! I have so many asian friends, its because they're awesome. By the way, kyle and I are like brothers, cause he's half japanese, and I'm half jewish...look up the emishi people, it makes sense (remember I'm writing for me not for you so I don't have to state my fucking sources, try wikipedia or some shit, I don't give a fuck there's no test, except for the test I made at quizyourfriends. com, there's a link on my myspace. Goddamn othello was soo much better than Romeo and juliett + Macbeth. even hamlet wasnt that good. Like, othello is up there with taming of the shrew and king leer. Yeah i now thats two tragedies and a commedy, sue me, I don't give a fuck, wanna fight about it?

where was I? oh yeah...I don't remember.
WOrld of Warcraft is bad, It takes to much time, and they nerfed the class I'm gonna play. I think I'm gonna play hunters, but they even nerfed priests! what the fuck? i already die all the time! Fuckers. I've been thinking about starting up a dnd game, actually I've been thinking about making my own variant illusionist class, combine some class skills and abilites of the rogue, sleight of hand, escape artist, hide in shadows, move silently, with the illusionist spells, make their spells charisma based, actually, they already have that, fuck it, I'm gonna make a variant of bard, switch up the spell lists, lose the bardic music+performance, change up the spell list a little bit, make them not able to wear armor, just to make up for their sneak attack or whatever I decide to give em. Then the gnomes can be illusionists, fuck the bard, magicians are waaaay better. I'm thinkin playin a houdini or a david blaine, chris angel guy in dnd might be neato, plus the prestige was a sweet movie, so was the illusionist, so there :P

Yngwie maalmsteen, is an angel of rock and roll. A messenger from heaven who exists to share with mankind the knowledge of shredding. Damn he is SOO GOOD! FUCK! also dragonforce is a force for me to be doing the reconing with, probably misspelled reconing, oh well, they play really fast rock, sounds like dnd rock to me a little bit, which i'd be a little embarassed to listen to with other people, like my techno, but its chill cause I like their music and people already think i'm weird. I should wear my contacts more. I've been looking at people far away for too long trying to see if they are who i think they are, then they wave and i'm all "oh shit, look what I've done" but anyways, thats what this place is for, sharing my insecurities with the world so that I can keep up my act. Basically having, eating, selling, and serving my cake too.

Fuck the police, seriously. Eugene has the biggest pile of incompetence in uniform I've ever seen. The only government institution worse than the police, well I guess there's two, ok, so it goes, in order from worst to least horrible: Post Office, LTD, Police. The post office blows ass, wait in line for 3 days for an overnight delivery, awesome. Wait at the stop for your bus to be late so you miss your next one and are late for class, and the police shoot kids and eachother. DAMN WHAT THE FUCK ARE WE PAYING TAXES FOR! JESUS CHRIST! No fucking Halo armor, no good government services, they're even destroying healthcare, awesome. Its a good thing the rest of the world sucks even more ass than America because if it didn't I might move there. We're bringing democracy to iraq, we're bringing our dictatocracy to Iraq, the specifics are outlined in my 9 page paper for writing 123, the enthymeme being Propaganda destroys democracy, ask me about it, I'll show it to ya sometime. but anyways, they're not being taken in as well as the poor white folks of 1776 america were. but anyways, where's our fucking oil? Bush wants to send in MORE TROOPS! The only way that 21000 more troops will make a difference is if you triple their number, and give them mjolnir mark 6 body armor, because thats not enough people to police a thousand year civil war when the army comes from America. Saddam was a crazymotherfucker, but he kept people in LINE! he was all "I'm a crazy motherfucker! you start shit i'ma gass your sandy ass" I'm not saying he was a good guy, but I am saying is that his way didn't have civil war. It seems to me that the US is that guy playin' poker whom Bill invited from work because the guy was gonna go home, masturbate and cry on a friday night, and nobody really wants him there, but the guy's loaded and he keeps losing money, cause even though he's got the resources for really badass poker playing body armor, he'd rather spend the money on porn and cheetos, and so he just keeps losing and losing and he wont go home, and its a win win for every other guy sittin around the sandy table cause if he keeps losin' they keep winnin' and if he goes home, they get rid of him. So I think that the guy just needs to get laid, so he should quit playin poker, and go talk to the rich lady across the streed, her name is China, and apologize for getting pissed off at her for cutting down her own sattelite tree and maybe inviter her over for tea and cookies. Maybe then she'll want to have sex with Uncle Sam, and he can finall fucking relax and start paying for his kids (citizens) to have a decent education, decent fucking public transportation that isn't so fucking worried about being on schedule that they trap a guy on the bus after his kids got off, some decent mail, some decent fucking police that, I dunno, when there's clearly not a dangerous criminal, could possibly ask questions first before unloading, i mean c'mon, even if you're gonna shoot him, there are nonlethal places to shoot that will incapacitate but not kill, goddamnit!, and maybe, just maybe, china could loan uncle sam some money so that his fucking soldiers could get some fucking halo armor, so that when the guys from the poker game start settin off "fireworks" in Uncle Sam's backyard, he can do somethin' about it and not loose a shit ton more "kids"

I'm not done, I have a lot more to say...I can feel it, but it's not coming right now so i'm gonna finish up for now, but i'll probably write more today, fuck now i'm pissed!

I hate each and every one of you

but don't worry, it's so deep down, most of the time I forget about it.

-Aaron

Psh

2007-01-15T19:03:50Z

Its weird, I don't ever have stuff to write about till i'm about halfway down the page and then I've written too much but I'm too lazy to rewrite it or delete it so you get half a page of crap and half of page of shit I don't want you to read, but thats how it goes, so here's the crap. Today I'm going to play chess with allie, and study for my chinese quiz on wednesday. Thats it. 24 freakin hours and I have 2 things to do! I'm finally on the downhill side of this blasted cold, and I'm thinkin' I'm doin' a little bit better on the topic of the last entry. Kristin told me last night that what she hoped would happen happened, so i can stop worrying. gah, sometimes people do some things that make you just go wah? but..why? you know? of course you don't, cause more than likely you're one of those people, or not, or you are, I don't care, moving on, My playstation has finally limped its way into the grave. I'm gonna try to clean the lense again but I think it might be time for a replacement. Good thing the xbox is still working cause they stopped makin em. I'm finally on expert on guitar hero 2, though i can only finish a couple songs, but hard is not so hard anymore. Nick really likes black sabbath, in all honesty, I don't much care for them, I'm more the guns and roses and acdc type I spose, at least when it comes to rock. I just think that a song needs to have more chords/notes in the corus than solos, but thats just me. I'm a horrible music listener. I listen to whats on the radio and cool songs that i randomly hear that i can download. (this is by no means an admission of guilt)

so here's a quandry for you
When you've been wanting to be with someone since 8th grade and had the feelings not reciprocated, you move on right? well go figure, as soon as you're moved on, they're right back in your face and you're all wowzer! where were you, like, 2 days ago??? but I guess thats the way shite works. And on top of that, how does one maintain credibility, turning down yet another person on the grounds that one is not seeking a relationship at the moment, only to have this "quandry" thrust upon him?, in addition to the whole "blonde girls with the same name saga that recently came to a close", what is a poor soul to do? Nick would look at me and say "oh man I'm so sorry for you, poor bastard has to choose between girls" well you know what? I deserve this quandry, I remember thinkin "I wonder what girl problems are like" way back freshman year, ya know? but it turns out, i guess I'd rather have them than not, at least someone else is the one getting hurt right?

It sounds horrible but honestly, its the place to be. Better to be confused and safe than know what you want and never get it right?

For all intensive purposes I was never over the one individual, or maybe I was. We'll have to wait and see, I'm not going to be doing anything decisive for now, that works out for the best right?

::Aaron's Dating tip::
Sober kissing is the best way to tell if someone likes you, at that moment, or if they just like kissing, or if they're just really polite, blah blah blah, ok i guess its not, but play along.
So when you're sick, or they're sick, its easy to misread signals, cause the kiss might be there but witheld due to either party's wish to not infect the other.

ok moving on, confucious sucks balls, know why? here's why, he doesn't explain his terms.
A Gentleman Must be benevolent.
A small man is not benevolent

what's a gentleman
what's his definition of benevolent

his terms are all defined by what they are not! its impossible!

clearly his benevolence is more specivic than characterized by or expressing goodwill or kindly feelings: a benevolent attitude; her benevolent smile.

so, therefore, fuck confucious, he can go stand on a toilet to get high on pot.

moving on...

Jesus was the man, here's why:
He lead by example. Whether or not he did miracles is irrelevant, the guy was a nice guy, he loved everyone. He basically said, be a nice guy, love everyone. he was accountable. Thats probably the best lesson you can learn from the guy, if you want to be a better person, act the way you think other people should act. I think thats just teriffic. Fuck the miracles, the salvation, the church, the pope, etc for just a second, if we just go "huh, that guy thinks people should act the way they tell others to act, and he was willing to die for that" he's a badass teacher, regardless of your religion.

Machiavelli was the man too, in a different way. He had different ideas about people than jesus did, to be sure, but he had a more negative view of people. Even so, he walked the talk. he said its better to be feared and loved, and go figure, successful rulers he influenced were feared before loved, cool stuff.

here's a fun idea, think about symbolism at its most basic level
Licifer was the morning star, he brought the light before he chalenged god and was sent to hell, well I have a sneaking suspicion that the lucifer guy represents logic and reasoning...and it works.

see, logic and reasoning was the number 2 guy in heaven "the mind" just as lucifer was the number 2 guy, so was logical reasoning science the #2 thing to think about, keeping God at #1. Just as lucifer thought to overthrow God, logic/science tries to do the same. They were once on the same team but because Lucifer/science tried to take over for God, they became enemies right? Which is horrible because it causes a balance through opposition as opposed to a balance through cooperation. As we all know, balance through oposition is far more dangerous. Just think about the people who believe in nothing but God or nothing but science in this world, I'm not commenting on atheists or anything, but aknowledge that there are people out there with one track closed minds and they are dangerous! We've gotta get back to balance, back to cooperation. Keep an open mind, see whats out there. Who's got the right idea? who knows, but you're never gonna get close if you don't listen to what they're saying.

'till next time
peace and love and all that goddamn hippy shit.

jege jou mou

2007-01-14T06:48:36Z

I was supposed to study today, but I can't focus on anything, what with my head full of fuzz from the medecine + sickness...journal, eesh. Maybe if I write on this thing, like, every day, I'll be able to look back and go "wow I didn't Only play videogames all day" even though I did. Its funny that I'd actually start writing on this thing because journals are your private thoughts right? but I guess not, because they are meant to be read, so why even write them? because deep down we want everyone to know what we're thinking right? if everyone knew everyone else's weaknesses, we'd have an even playin field with all the bullshit thrown away. too bad thats not gonna happen right? too risky being open and honest. People will find a way to get you complacent and then crush you when you least expect it. I just realized somene reading this will think i'm writing about a specific instance, venting about my own frustrations at something horrible that has happened to me, well that is incorrect. I'm simply explaining what I've discovered about human nature, but then I ask myself, is there something bugging me that could have triggered this? perhaps there is some event that I'm bugged by, or maybe a series of events. I dunno. acutally I do. I'm bugged about the state of the family. Everything is perfect, dad and I are moving out, mom gets zac and marissa and the house, no problem, but if I felt feelings, I'd still be feelin' pretty shitty. This split has needed to happen forf too long, its unhealthy for all involved, but its still kind of a blow to my paradigm, then again I'm thinkin I should already be past this because "technically I'm supposed to be moved out by now so the comings and goings of the "rents" should have no bearing on my day to day, but I'm not, and it does. It bugs me, ok? of course its ok. this is a journal right? nobody will read this right? of course...but just for fun I'm not gonna put the little eyeball on it...isn't that fun? I'm going stir crazy so the only excitement i have is from the possibility that someone will read this and go "damn, that guys a douche" or whatever. How sad is that? gah, stupid stupid stupid, but i'm not gonna delete it, because I've already written so much and deep down, like i said before, I want you to read it. Logically I don't but I do! so read it, judge me! look down your powdered nose at me! I'm on display now fuckers! my ideas, thoughts and shit. and you know what? fuck it.
Peace out
I'd say the n word right there, but I'm white and I don't know how the random reader would take that.